Poem: Healing Self-Sabotage

“You are not your fear in disguise.”

I built the wall and blamed the rain,
Then cried behind it, wrapped in pain.
Each time I neared the edge of light,
I pulled the curtains on my sight.

A hand half-raised, then dropped again—
Why reach for joy, if joy won’t stay?
I called it fate, I called it flaw,
But fear was whispering the law.

I fed myself with smaller dreams,
Said, “Safety first,” through silent screams.
And every path I might’ve tried
Was folded up and set aside.

But now I see with gentler eyes
The clever shape of my disguise.
The ways I broke what I could build
Were wounds unmet, were truths unspilled.

So here I stand—no whip, no blade—
Just breath and grace, mistakes replayed.
The voice that told me, “Not enough,”
Was trying to shield me from the rough.

But I am done with shrinking skin.
The fire’s out—I let truth in.
No more the thief of my own day,
No more the one who walks away.

I plant new seeds in soil I’ve cleared,
With hands that once were clenched in fear.
I rise, not perfect, but aligned—
With peace ahead, and love behind.

Thank-you for reading.

Much Love and Light,

Brenda Marie